The LOOK of Second Class Citizenship

For the last 20 years the medical guidelines have been that once you reach the age of 40, women should begin to have regular mammograms. At 18 years of age I had my first mammogram. I had just had a physical a couple of weeks before and my doctor gave me a plastic door hanger type card that I could hang from the shower head and showed how to do self check breast exams. One day I decided to practice what I had been depicted on the card. I was looking at myself in the mirror and noticed an abnormality, at least for me, with my breasts; one was larger than the other, noticeably so to me and I was freaking out. In order to calm me down, my mother placed a call to my doctor and an appointment with an ob/gyn was scheduled. At the age of 18 I had my first mammogram and while no lump was discovered, what the mammogram showed was that I had  Fibrocystic Breast Condition. This is a condition that can sometimes lead to an increase in having breast cancer and one that is not normally detected in women until they turn 30. 


No mammograms until the age of 50!


Discontinue teaching of the breast self exam!


The headlines have been screaming for the last couple of days about the recent US Preventive Services Task Force recommendation would have prevented this condition from being detected and my doctor taking a more proactive approach to my care.




The report recommends that women between the ages of 40 – 49 should not get routine mammograms for early detection. Women ages 50 – 74 should only have them every 2 years. The task force also recommends against teaching breast self-exams for all women and said evidence was insufficient to recommend mammograms for women older than 74.


"The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force is a panel of primary care clinicians (e.g., internists, pediatricians, family physicians, gynecologists/obstetricians, and nurses). Individual members' interests include: decision modeling and evaluation; effectiveness in clinical preventive medicine; clinical epidemiology; the prevention of high-risk behaviors in adolescents; geriatrics; and the prevention of disability in the elderly."


This report could not be more detrimental to women every where. I am 40 years old. I have been having mammograms since I was 18 years old. I have heavy breasts and have been diagnosed with fibrocystic breast condition in both breasts. I have never had a major lump or tumor but preventive care has played an enormous role in this process.  


My mammograms have not only given a peace of mind but have also provided me with the information without detection it could possibly matasticize into a hard mass. I know what drinks (with caffeine) to avoid and what foods to eat and not eat in order to ensure that I continue my proactive self care.


My issue is not so much with this report. I believe we are at an age where more women will self advocate for these services. My issue is that as women, we seem to always get the short end of the stick. This is the information that women who are reluctant to have mammograms will use to not have them and avoid getting check ups.


This is not self-victimization post.


As women, we tend to put self care last because we are always looking out for everyone else. As this report was made public, a huge group of girlfriends and I got into a heated email discussion about this very subject. Some are survivors of breast and cervical cancer. For them early detection is what has given them a chance to continue to live life. The rest of us have never experienced any form of cancer but we are concerned and angred by this report none the less.


Second class citizenship or treatment with respect to women is not acceptable.


The report does not make sense. We have living proof in front of us that early detection works and should be encouraged. Waiting is not an option.


Women matter, our lives matter.

A Blogger's Headache... The Art of Blogging

Blogging is new to me.

Its also one of the most frustrating experiences of my life. My blog is supposed to deal with current events and/or trends via social networking sites, yahoo groups, and listservs. Yet there are times when a subject speaks to your heart and mind that it literally shuts everything else down. I have a feeling this is how folks who write for a living must feel at times.

I have looked at the same social networking sites and email groups that have inspired me in the past and I draw a blank. It’s frustrating because I could have written a witty blog on various Twitter trending topics like: #signstherelationshipisover, #wecoolandall and #whatsbetter.


This one topic will not let me move forward. It makes my head hurt!

If this was any old topic this entire post would be moot. Its not.

Its controversial, explosive and its one that resonates across cultural and racial lines.

Will I write about this topic?

Yes, eventually because I can’t move forward until I do. I can’t write another meaningful blog until I get this out.

What I do know right now is that in order to write and ensure that my voice is heard, I need to think and plan. Words are a powerful tool, even while blogging.

Yes this topic makes me nervous.

Not because it’s controversial but because I will be in essence speaking for those who can’t, those who choose not to and those who still live in the shadows.

So plan and write I must.

To try and do otherwise would be painful and in the end an exercise in futility.

Stay tuned

Missed Opportunities - Greek Lettered Organizations and Human Decency

People are funny creatures. 

Yes! I said funny creatures. 

Life for us is full of missed opportunities. 

Whouda... shouda... coulda

We spend our childhood rushing to get older and then long to be children again. We are anxious about the future to such an extent that we forget about the present and we live neither in the present or the future. 

Like I said missed opportunities.

I see this all the time just by reading various social networking sites or reading the emails that come across the various listservs and yahoo groups which I have access. One such listserv serves as the information well for two Greek lettered organizations, of which I am a member, that for better or worst, are closely intertwined. These organizations serve and support chapters at colleges/ universities whose students are members of band ensembles at their respective schools.

The past two weekends have been particularly harrowing as there have been reports of two highway bus crashes in which members of their university marching bands, en route to games, have been involved. This particular listserv, conversations can and usually are had about almost anything; from the serious (i.e. hazing, expulsions from the organizations, etc) to the ridiculous (i.e. Jell-O wrestling at conventions, who stole what mascot etc). You would think that news of bus crashes involving two different universities on back-to-back weekends would warrant the listservs to explode? 

Not these students and not this listserv. 

Instead an email posted two days prior to the first bus accident by a member of one of the organizations, and was requesting information overtook and reached what is in my opinion ridiculous proportions. 

Missed opportunities.

For all intent purposes I'll call the person who posted the initial email Toviah. T for short. The gist of T's email was to let his fellow members of both organizations know he has relocated to a new area in the Southeastern part of the US and would like to connect with fellow members living in the area. One of the replies he gets comes across as a bit abrupt. He makes a mention of the "tone" of the reply in his response. Another member decides to contact him off list and chastise him for his reply. T being some what exasperated and very opinionated then proceeds to make that email public on the listserv. Regardless of whether he was right or wrong, what ensues is literally almost a week long of insane correspondence on "netiquette" on the listserv, how members should speak to each other and what should or should not be disseminated on the listserv.  

Tons of missed opportunities

Alumni members of the organization from the first school involved in the bus crash made mention of the crash and ask for support in terms of instruments that were lost and prayers for those injured. Toviah then tries to re-direct the conversation to focus on the members involved in the bus crash.

"Brothers and sisters please sift through all of this crap to read the important posts about X's band and the questions about the Alumni Ceremony.

It's amazing how this got more play than the important posts... LOL

My prayers go out to those who were involved in that accident and I'll be contributing something to the band.  I strongly urge others to open their hearts and piggy banks to do the same."

Does this deter the focus of the sublime to what is really important, concern for your fellow man? 

No not at all. 

At this point in all of this chatter the hierarchy of the membership decides to post. Now I am thinking it’s the voice of reason coming to the rescue. They will say something about the injured band members. Ask students to focus and assist, serve this band in their time of need. 

Nope, not a chance.

What follows is not a reinforced explanation that email is subjective and left to the readers interpretation and that there are greater matters at hand to need attention; instead more opinions are stated about how the first response to Toviah was correct and emails which other inferred that they were being accused of condoning behavior which is detrimental to both organizations.

Like I said, missed opportunities. 

This past weekend another bus crash occurred involving another collegiate marching band. An alumni member of the organization and first school that suffered the first accident posted news of the second accident. There has not been an email asking for contact information, prayers being sent up or asking about the well being of any of the students or if any members of the organizations were involved in the accident. 

T despite repeated requests to be contacted off list and for folks to be concerned with the band crash and other questions being asked has been personally attacked. Incidents in his personal life have been swept from under the proverbial rug and may be used to bring him to heel so to speak. Personally, I have no idea. I can make the assumption that is the case after speaking with him. People will do and say anything even hitting below the belt, in order to get their point across and shut someone down, so to speak. 

Missed opportunities.

This past weekend while members from another university's marching band program experienced a bus crash, alums from the university that suffered the first bus crash flew, drove (from as far as Delaware and Cleveland), set aside family and work responsibilities to pick up an instrument and march at their alma mater's half-time show. Some hadn't marched in a decade. There were lots of bones and muscles hurting and alot of ben-gay being rubbed on that night. When I asked why they did it? The response time after time was it was the least they could do. No matter where they are or what they are doing when the call for support and service is made someone has to answer it.

What troubles me the most is how easily it is to dismiss these events from our daily lives. How easy it is not to care. Points will be made valid or not that all these emails are teaching moments and educate the masses on this particular listserv on avoiding future problems. Valid... yes and no.

Right now all I see is a lot of missed opportunities and none of us are better because of it.

3 BLOGS on Social Networking and Current Events Trends

There are three blogs that I found that I believe are a frame of reference for my blog. The first one is called Achenblog by Joel Achenbach its an opinion blog at the Washington Postthat focuses on current events and the writer's own opinion and especially how his psyche works in relation to all these opinions and current events . The next blog is Complexity and Social Networks Blog. This blog is out of the Institute for Quantitative Social Science and the Program on Networked Governance, at Harvard University. It covers an array of topics and how it relates to social networking. It gives you alot of insight into different topics and current trending topics on the social network scene that alot of may over look. I like this blog because the topics and its content make me think and entertain a different idea at times. The last blog is Soledad Obrien CNN Blog. Soledad doesn't blog often but then again when she does what she has to say may not be the topic that everyone is focused at the time but because she has such a compelling way of drawing people in with her stories, they quickly become a national interest story.

As I think about my target audience, it is not geared toward an age specific demographic. It is geared towards anyone who is into the social network scene and derives their news and current events from these sites. As I progress with my blog it is a work in progress. With each post I hope to create not only an honest core group of followers but also play a part in the current events and trending topics in heavy rotation.

There Ought to be A LAW!!!

So last week, Friday I think, I checked on all the listservs and yahoo groups that I have a membership, there are quite a few. A bunch has to do with romance stories. I am a true romance junkie. I lean more towards erotica literature on some days but over all a good story with some conflict, an testosterone alpha male and HEA (happily ever after) is right up my alley when I want to just forget. I wish on Friday I could have gotten a do over and completely forgotten. It was not the way I wish anyone to start their Friday mornings.

A friend on one of the yahoo groups is a foster parent. A few days before a social worker called and asked her if she could take in a four year old little boy. This little boy was physically abused by his mother. There were visible gashes and bruises on his face and upper body. The social worker warned my friend to not be "alarmed" at the rings around the penis area. My friend was completely perplexed.


Rings???


Seems the mother decided that the best way to toilet train her son was to tie his penis with string... Tightly so that he would not "wet the bed at night". As I am driving to work all I can think about is my 2 year old son that I left at the babysitter not 30 minutes prior. All of the women on the listserv are calling for bodily damage to this unknown woman who birthed this innocent child. As I forward the post to facebook, my friends start to chime in and before I know there is a full blown discussion on how there should be a law against people like this who give birth and are not fit to be parents.


As I was trying to reply, I am crying uncontrollably because my mind can't comprehend how one human being can hurt the most innocent of innocent. Her own child. At this point I am raging against the world. The injustice of the scars both physical and emotional that the child will have to endure. I am angry and I hurt right along with all those posting on the group and on facebook calling for this woman's "head" on the proverbial platter. I want to march to this city and force the government to take care of its most innocent citizens. I want to march and rally and create PSAs that will bring light to an all too common problem.


While I voice my opinion on facebook and the group and plot and plan with my friends, I realize it’s nothing more than us being idealistic. We won't affect change to help this child. We won't pass a law that will make it impossible for this woman to do this again.


She's seven months pregnant with her 2nd child.


There ought to be a law!